DISCOVER THE REALITY OF THE EARLY YEARS OF MARRIAGE

By: Julita Kantod

Tawau : Marriage is a beautiful and unique journey. It is a combination of unpredictable learning and management processes to create a strong love base. Early marriages show that some couples are strong enough to paddle forward and some need support and guidance from older couples.

After being inspired by several chapters from Amoris Laetitia (AL), the Family Life Ministry of Holy Trinity Parish Tawau held a one-day seminar for 8 young couples married between 5 to 7 years in Bahasa Malaysia on 17th March 2018 from 7.30am to 3.30pm in the Church Basement Room. The event began with the Enthronement of the Bible.

The seminar aimed to make couples more aware on the current challenges that may affect the family life. It will also strengthen their relationship bond and together as a couple shall face with courage and confidence in managing their marriage.

The talk encompasses the Awareness and Formation session;

Awareness Session :

1. Family and current Issues affecting the family : Internet, Individualismand communication (extracted  from Amoris Laetitia chapter 2 – Joy of Love)

Formation Session :

1. Insight into parenting   - proper education to children

2. Love and forgiveness in the family – chapter 4 of AL

3. Spirituality in Marriage – chapter 9 of AL

The awareness session was jointly facilitated by Francis Clement and Petrus Bernadus. Both sessions begin with group discussion / sharing on their real challenges experienced during their marriage.

Some pointers touched on addiction, misunderstanding, isolation, suspicion, hidden relationship, health issues, communication, poor parenting and safety.

Part 2 of the Awareness Session was presented by Petrus Bernadus on the culture of individualism.

Marriage is built from two people and not as an individual. The presence of their children will make the home more alive and meaningful.

Pointers gathered on their real life experienced caused by individualism in the family include the hardening of hearts, detachment, stress and hurt, dominance, pride, insecurity and poor communication.

The Formation Sessions were presented by Sr. Julita Joseph on the Spirituality of marriage, Mario Domingo on the Love and forgiveness in marriage and Julita Kantod on the insight into parenting.

The 3 topics presented allowed participants to reflect and recall on their own married life journey. The following were the gist of the sessions;

· love in the marriage conquered every imperfection that may arise in the family

· Christ-centred family will not be easily shaken by the outside world but strengthened by the power of Christ’s light

· parenting is an opportunity to raise up God’s children according to God’s want and that is to make our children know the personality of Christ.

In winding up the Seminar, Julita, the Chairperson of the Family Life Ministry, encouraged the participants by saying, “as a young married couple, you must learn and observe how other senior couples live their married life, do not be ashamed to seek for advice, guidance or support from them in order to sustain your marriage.”

Participants are inspired and committed to protect and sustain the beautiful meaning of family especially in their relationship as husband and wife. They acknowledged that such seminar should be continued for it is a rich source of information and above all it affirms the couples.

The Seminar ended at 3.30 pm with a Prayer for the Family.